Last Updated on May 28, 2023 by Britt Olizarowicz
When I was working as an assistant golf professional, we had a couples golf league every Sunday afternoon. Some of the couples wore matching outfits, had team names, loved themed events, and supported each other the entire time they were on the course.
And then there were the others.
I’ll get into more details on the others and a story about having to enter into a situation as a golf professional disguised as a marriage counselor.
All jokes aside, couples golf is a great thing, and you and your partner can benefit from it. My husband and I play golf together several days a week, and it’s become one of our favorite things to do together.
What makes couples golf great?
Couples golf is a great way to spend time with your partner. Golf can take anywhere from two to five hours to complete, depending on how many holes you are playing. Enjoying a round of couples golf means time to catch up, talk and enjoy each other’s company.
In addition, couples golf is a way to support your partner in their goals and passions. Even if one partner is more excited about golf than another, it’s great to see someone succeed and take their game to the next level.
Mostly, couples golf is designed to be fun. It should be something you and your spouse look forward to and enjoy; if it’s not, skip it!
How to succeed at couples golf?
If you are headed out for your first couples golf experience or want to try it after a bad experience, here are some of the best tips for success.
The golden rule
You learned this one in kindergarten, and it applies to couples golf as well. Treat others the way that you would like to be treated. If you don’t want someone telling you that the one thing you had to do was keep it out of the bunker, don’t say this to your partner.
If you are particular about where people stand or advice being given on the golf course, just say so.
As a golf professional, I always want to help my husband fix the flaws in his golf swing. He wants no part of it. It’s been tough for me to let it go; at this point, I’ve accepted it, and I moved on. (Although this was not easy!)
Don’t push it
If couples golf is not something your spouse is all that excited about, don’t push it. We found this to be the case with our kids when they were learning to play. If you let them be and almost ignore that they aren’t interested in playing, sometimes it works out.
Start by asking your partner if they want to come for a ride or a walk with you on the course. Every once in a while, they may try to make a putt or a chip, and we all know that once that happens, it’s easy to get hooked.
Check-in on the competitive nature
Competitiveness is great. However, competitions are the most fun when both people are willing participants. Some couples can go out and play a match every time they play golf (this is what we do); others would have a very hard time doing this.
Whether you are on your spouse’s team or playing against them, make sure you don’t get too over the top with the competitive nature. Also, we all love the quiet winner, so strive to be that person.
Remember what the goal is
What is the goal of playing couples’ golf? Are you really out there to take home the $22 in shop credit they are offering for 2nd Net?
No.
The purpose of this is to spend time with your spouse, enjoy that time and create memories. Keep that in mind when things get a little hairy out on the course.
Start with 9 holes
Nine holes is like dipping your toe in the water. If nine holes is fun, and everybody still loves each other (kidding) at the end, then go ahead and turn it into an 18-hole match. Nine holes are a good starting point because people won’t be tired, cranky, or thirsty!
Play with friends
Couples golf can be made all that much more fun by adding friends.
I’ve seen this done in several ways. One option is for couples to ride together in their own cart; other times, you see the wives go together and then the husbands.
When people get really into it, you will find two foursomes going out, a group of men followed by a group of women, and they meet for drinks and dinner afterward. Golf with friends is always more fun, so find a solution that works for you.
Remember that men and women swing differently (a lot differently)
The game of golf is just different for men than it is for women. As a woman golfer who has played golf for 30 years, I don’t see any negatives or downsides to being a woman golfer, except for a slight loss of power.
That is typically made up with a tee placement that is a bit different.
However, your swing and your spouse’s swing will be different. It’s best not to try and create matching golf swings, as one or both of you will be a little off. Save the golf swing mechanics and teaching for the professionals.
Course management is a personal thing
Want to cut the corner on a dogleg? Want to lay up short of the water and go over? That’s your decision. We all get the same golf course to play, but we can play it however we want to play it.
Remember that you can’t force your course management on another player. Not only is that difficult from a physical perspective, it also creates issues in the mental game.
Course management has some best strategies, but the best way to get around the golf course is unique for each player.
Are you ready to play more couples golf?
If you find that couples golf is still fun, keep playing.
Some couples enjoy spending time together on the golf course but don’t do all that well playing in tournaments. This was the case when I was an assistant professional running a couples golf tournament.
The couple had been out playing for about 35 minutes when we got a phone call in the shop to go and pick up one of the wives participating in the event. We weren’t sure exactly what had happened, so I was chosen to go pick her up.
When I got to the hole, she was standing off to the side of the green, and I asked her if she was alright; she looked at me and said, “Never again.”
As I said, couples golf is not for everyone!
How to get involved at your country club
Country clubs are becoming more and more family orientated. If you want to play golf with your spouse at your country club, it should be easy to find an opportunity.
Couples golf tournaments
Couples golf tournaments can be simple and fun, like a nine and dine event. In addition, you may find a couples club championship to participate in.
Outings with friends
Find friends that also like to play golf with their spouse. Two couples that enjoy each other’s company do make for a fun afternoon of golf.
Weekend afternoons
We call Sunday afternoons couples golf at our club. It’s not an official thing, but the course is just filled with couples playing golf together. They range in age from twenties to nineties, and it certainly makes you think about the way golf can become part of your relationship for the entire duration.
Final Thoughts
If you are new to the game or have always kept golf a separate activity, I encourage you to try couples golf. My husband and I play a few times a week and have a consistent match-play tournament each time we go out. It’s fun, we secretly want the other person to shoot their best round ever, and our kids get to see how a game like golf can be more than just a game.
